Getting Back Your Ex-Girlfriend

You miss her. You can’t stop thinking about her, this special woman who is no longer part of your life. How do you go about getting back your ex-girlfriend? Certainly there is something you can do.

The dilemma faced by a number of men is how to rekindle their relationship with that unforgettable girl, and there is no simple answer.

Your options are governed by a number of concerns, not the least of which is why she broke up with you in the first place. Were you unfaithful, inattentive, or didn’t share the same interests, or were you just plain boring?

All of these are huge obstacles, but none of them is insurmountable. There had to be something that drew you together in the first place and you have to go back to that point to try and renew her interest.

First and foremost, don’t plead with her. That is a sure-fire turn-off. You immediately paint yourself as pitiful and you abdicate any negotiating position. Begging her to come back to you will cost you any respect she may have for you and your self-respect as well.

If she is a really “up-front” person, you should ask her to meet with you, maybe over dinner at a favorite restaurant. Meeting in a noisy bar or hangout wouldn’t be a smart idea. You want a reasonably quiet, friendly place, preferably one with some fond memories for both of you.

If you have something to feel contrite about, apologize to her at the outset. Then state your case, recalling the many good aspects of your relationship.

Make the point that you shared so much good that it would be a shame not to work on overcoming the negative issues together and make your relationship the best it can be for both of you.

Another tactic is a third-party intervention. This can be either direct or indirect. A mutual friend can suggest directly that “you guys were such a good couple; it is sad that you don’t get back together. I know (your name here) talks about you all the time and how much he misses you.”

A less direct approach would be for that friend to frequently comment on what a nice couple you were together. They could go on to say, “It’s a shame that you never worked out your differences.”

If they report back that there is any sign of interest, you should be on it in a flash while the thought is still fresh in your ex-girlfriend’s mind.

Okay, you’ve made the connection; now what is the next step? Make sure you have a plan. Just like in any presentation, unless you are an improvisational phenomenon, you should have a well thought-out agenda for your first meeting.

You should use a tried-and-true method like the “Ho-Hum Formula” for public speaking: Use an attention-getting opening statement, tell them why you are there, go into the body of your speech and then close with a reaffirmation of why you are there.

As neophyte salesmen are admonished, “Don’t forget to ask for the sale!” If there is interest, ask for a reconciliation with your sweetheart. If the response is ambivalent or negative, you should determine why this is her response so you know what your next step will be.

Unless your sin was totally unforgivable, you should be able to generate interest in a renewed relationship. If you lay out the good reasons to reconnect and you promise to resolve all of your problems, you should be successful.

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How To Get Your Boyfriend Back

Breakups are hard. They’re even harder if you don’t feel the split was a good idea. If you’re ready to give it another go and want to know how to get your boyfriend back, there are things you can do.

Keep in mind that not every relationship is reparable and that sometimes staying apart is much better for both parties. If your relationship was truly unhealthy, or if it involved violence or serious betrayal at the end, you may want to closely examine the idea of trying to get your boyfriend back.

If you have examined your relationship and feel it’s truly worth salvaging and making better, there are several tips you may want to try to get your boyfriend back.

Tip 1 – Explore the reasons for the breakup. If you want to get your boyfriend back, there will generally be issues with the relationship that will need to be resolved. Examine where things went wrong and what can be done to overcome the problem or problems. Remember that relationships are two-way streets and so are breakups. Chances are, the “fault” lies with both parties.

Tip 2 – Give him some space. If you really want to get your boyfriend back after a split, state your desire and then give him some space. Don’t hound him, send notes, pester or otherwise harass him. State your case, and be clear about why you think things went wrong and what your ideas are of how to right those wrongs. He’ll either come around or he won’t.

Tip 3 – Take care of yourself. Breakups can take their toll on more than your emotions. Now is not the time to let yourself or your health go. If you really want to get your boyfriend back, try to be kind to yourself by eating right, staying in shape and trying to focus on being kind to yourself. Your boyfriend is likely to find you more attractive if you put forth the effort to take care of yourself.

Tip 4 – Stay positive. Use the law of attraction to your advantage and try to maintain a positive attitude. Even if your boyfriend hasn’t contacted you back about your request to work things out, proceed with the belief that the situation will resolve itself in your favor. Even if you don’t get “him” back, your positive attitude could bring other good things (and people) into your life.

Tip 5 – Develop your own interests. While you two are working things out or as you wait for his response, don’t sit around pining for the phone to ring. Get out and explore your own interests. Stand on your own as a person. Have fun and truly enjoy yourself. Doing so can help boost your self-esteem, which will make you a happier person. Happy, positive people tend to attract positive attention from others.

Tip 6 – Remain open-minded. If you have stated your desire to get back together and he’s agreeable to talking, use good communication skills to try and bridge the gaps between you. Talk out your problems without letting anger get in the way. Listen to what he has to say and share your feelings and observations, too.

If you want to get your boyfriend back, be honest, open and positive. Even if it doesn’t work out quite the way you wanted it to, you may find yourself happier for making the effort.

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